A whisper of orange on There was the horizon. desert in Pakistan, A thousand black but I don’t turbines. remember it.
Miles of solar panels like a black ocean I’ve never seen close up. All I remember is You can’t get used to the this. stars, no matter how long you live here.
In My Room
Annoying Habit #92
Slide Slogans from School That I Fire at Mom (just to annoy her)
“Please, Ally, have mercy!” “Give us the Mom says. issues, not “A word-wall is a But she’s the tissues!” long haul!” laughing.
“Add a graphic and increase your “Charts should illuminate, traffic!” not complicate!”
Mom Spots the Toy Horse
“Oh Ally, I love seeing that horse,” Mom says.
“What about this?” I Ask, and Open the Book.
Sasha in the Picture
Mom’s Reasons for Not Talking About That Time
Lincoln’s Bed Is on the Other Side of the Wall from My Bed
• 2 knocks from his side = • 2 knocks from my side = “Good night, Ally.” “Good night, Linc.” • Mom will go to his room • I can hear them talking next. through the wall. • Lincoln gets her longest. • I get her first.
Mom Sits on the Edge of My Bed
What I Suddenly Understand
Lincoln Appears When I’m Half Asleep
“A MINUTE AND FOURTEEN SECONDS!” Lincoln bellows.
“What is going on in here?”
Kids—c Dinner prty Buy Sharpies all Gma
Mom’s “Art” Langs—bring Blk Blake!! wine! Caring for your She uses Ally SmartFan They come from sleepover “found @Suzette objects. our house and 9/19 ” our lives. Eye appt 3:30 Pick Wed up She glues Ada’s shoes She says them Linc—therapy pie they’re onto 2pm crust— precious use 1/18 boards lard! Grapes because and Skim milk they’re casual shellacs Earl Grey tea and them. Drew shampoo meaningless. Krazy Glue Peanut butter “But they Mexico Flight Rolaids tell the Conf:#:XJKD78 whole story I look when she’s 77 if you really not there. look.”
Ways It Can Be When Dad Comes Back Sits in Ca Kissin g Befor r Mom Comi e ng In Hugg Tellin ing g Mom Storie s Silent Laugh ing
Wine Angry Co Poppi rk ng Gin P ourin g
Dad Comes Home Late
I hear the Mom has brushing her arms door around through my Dad. They don’t sleep. say anything. His face is I peek in her hair. through my door slit.
There’s a blanket on Mom’s Waiting Chair where she fell asleep.
One Night Later
Dad Barbecues Chicken on the Deck
Facts About Dad
Rob Was Mom’s Best Friend.
Dad’s Questions/Lincoln’s Answers Can I play I see music, Dad? them at Any kids school. I’d you feel Not rather today. play like asking Three. music. over to Nope. play? We Did you lost How have music Want to many at- 5–2. class with have a bats did Mom? catch after you dinner? have? Anything new at How did school the game today? go the other night?
Signs That Dad Isn’t Happy
“Sure, Linc,” he says, after dinner. “Let’s hear some music.”
Songs with Lincoln’s Comments
Dad, to Mom, Whispering Under the Music (but I can hear him)
“Stop!” Dad shouts. “Stop. Please. Forget I asked.”
Lincoln Starts to Cry
“The pause makes you think the song will end. And then the song isn’t really over, so you’re relieved. But then the song does actually end, because every song ends, obviously, and THAT. TIME. THE. END. IS. FOR. REAL.”
A Pause While We Stand on the Deck
Then Dad Gathers Lincoln into His Arms
Lincoln Runs Inside and Slams His Bedroom Door
It Starts Where Our Lawn Used to Be
“I’ve got to do better with Lincoln,” Dad Says.
The Old Golf Course
A Long, Empty Stretch of Walking
After a Long Time, We Reach the Solar Panels
Suddenly, There’s a Whirring Noise Around Us
We Stand a Long Time, Watching the Solar Panels Move
After a While, I Feel Like Curling Up on the Ground and Closing My Eyes
We Walk for Several Years
Dad Points to a Snake on one of Mom’s Sculptures
What I’m Afraid Of
Dad Sets Me Down on Our Porch
What I Hear as I’m Falling Asleep
Hey You Yeah. Linc. hear that No. sound?
That. No, Pop.
Here, let’s stand by the window. Listen with me. What does that sound like to you?
“Okay. I know.”
Relationship of Pause-Length to Haunting Power
Proof of the Necessity of Pauses
Discoveries About Pause Timing (in Bubble Form) Pause power
Time remaining after pause (sec)
The Persistence of Pauses over Time Length of song (min)